Yeah, sure there's that getting presents thing, but I've had about enough of this whole holiday. It used to carry it's load when all I had to do was ask for something, then a few weeks later it'd appear beneath a magical tree. But now that I'm not seven years old, christmas is sucking pretty hard. There's having to fight through hordes of evil mole people to even leave the house, and christmas music and all the goddamned gaudy decorations, I'm sick of the whole creeping thing ( Oh, see my normal journal if you'd like to know how I feel about mole people</a>. What are we supposed to be celebrating again? Umm... I think some old dude was killed 'cause he was some sort of leper, then he wouldn't die... or something... Anyway, the story sounded bogus to me. The son of god was miraculously born on this day, so everyone should cut down a tree and leave it in their living room so that a big fat guy from the north pole has someplace to put your gifts when you leave some food out for him. What a stupid fucking holiday! New Years! Now there's a holiday! No good will toward man or any of that shit, just a big-ass excuse to party! So, anyway, this christmas, I'm being mean as hell.
THE VERDICT - 3
You heard it here first. There's no christmas in heaven. Jesus stopped caring about his birthday about one thousand nine hundred seventy years ago.